Well i don't know where to begin, but i know all friends and family have received the news, but my gorgeous Richard died the morning of Sunday 22 February 2004.
Richard suffered from a heart attack, we have been told he would have been quick and he wouldn't have suffered.
Richards chest and throat got worse on Saturday and after lots of tests etc they treated it as anxiety and a general virus affecting the chest and throat. His chest xray and ECG came out fine. I was there from 10.30am till 7.30pm on the Saturday. He couldn't talk very well but they were doing their best to make him comfortable.
Unfortunatley he had had a couple of tumbles on the Wed/Thurs so he also had two black eyes. Also Richards mother was told she couldn't stay with him any more overnight as he was in a shared male ward.
I left Richard Saturdy night, with a loving smile and the positiveness that he could get through the night without one of us there, and that i or his sister will be there in the morning. I will never forget that we took ages saying goodbye and his face as i left.
I heart goes out to his loving parents, family and friends.
I have copied his fathers speech and my speech from Richards funeral, and Sarah (Richards boss and Friend) might be able to add hers to shortly. Thank you for reading this and if it has been of any help to anyone, i'm sure Richard will be feeling pleased that he started it.
Lots of Love SallySutton
Richard J. SUTTON 1967 to 2004.
Although the baby boy entered this world in Singapore, it was in another Far Eastern
place, Hong Kong, that Richard spent some of his young formative years. You may
well imagine the fascinating and lasting experiences this provided a young person. No
one needed a Theme Park when living in Hong Kong then. They were already in one!
He then came to Norfolk in 1976, by which time he was already an out-of-doors
person and, shall we say, leaning more towards becoming an athlete than an
academic. Already a strong swimmer, happiest with a football at his feet, and one to
enjoy a good walk.
His schools in Norfolk fostered his games-playing inclinations. Running, Squash,
Tennis, Soccer, Rugby and Hockey all flourished. He was to continue with most of
these, and others, for many years following his school days. He joined several clubs
and won many awards, as is now in evidence in the family home.
Richard's running included that of many Half-Marathons and some Full-Marathons.
His hill-walking found him on the top of the highest peaks of England, Scotland and
Wales in just one 24-hour period. Many such tasks were undertaken in recent years. Most were for charitable fund-raising. Ironically, leukaemia might already have been with him.
He always enjoyed cycling. The height of that pastime was the amazing feat of
cycling across the Sierra Nevada, along Europe's highest road, in Spain. The depth of
that cycling pastime was when he fell from his bike, earlier this year, having
temporarily forgotten just how weak his legs had become.
The determination and enduring powers necessary to achieve well in such pursuits
were to be applied throughout his last months, together with much enormous mental
strength, courage and bravery.
Richard did relax sometimes. Fishing formerly provided him with plenty of
relaxation. A guitar was normally at hand. Music gave him plenty of enjoyment,
especially that of the Beatles.
The entry of Sally, his wife, into Richard's life was the beginning of his happiest
years. There is no doubt about that.
During their courtship, Sally was clearly seen, at a certain lakeside, with a fishing-rod
in hand, receiving angling-lessons from Richard. Was this to be the start of a fishing
partnership? Did Sally bite, or take the bait? Answer? "No!" In fact, it may have gone
the other way. Somehow, Richard's fishing just discontinued.
However, he is to rest just outside this Parish Church, close to where the brilliant
Kingfisher birds have their homes. There is something very fitting about that.
Throughout his long and final ordeal, Richard remained very well aware of the great
support he was receiving, if only from a distance. It came from his family, friends,
relatives and, importantly, from colleagues at Norwich Union. He felt all of this
strongly. It is difficult to describe.
There is clearly great camaraderie within his former team or group at the Norwich
Union. He was a contributor to that throughout the good times, and derived from it during his tough time.
Those persons here today, and who contributed such support, know who they are.
Such strength acted towards nearly saving Richard's life. I am here trying to relay a
message of gratitude which he would have wished to have conveyed. Please also pass
it on to all others who may have given such kindness.
Richard also had the benefit of four lovely and loving ladies in his life.
His fun-loving wife, and very best friend, Sally, who commanded and provided him
with so much cheer, happiness, love and joy.
A close and caring relationship existed with his sister Joanne. It was Joanne who
shared herself with Richard for the vitally important Bone Marrow Transplant -
which we thought might be the save-all.
A wonderful and most devoted mother, Jo, who never ceased to provide great care,
compassion and concern. Jo was as a sunbeam to Richard from his beginning to his
end. Richard, in his own manner, repaid as he could. A true mother/son love affair.
The fourth lovely lady is the little-charmer - the delightful daughter of Richard and
Sally, Ellie. Her arrival in this world provided Richard with, and I quote his words,
"the most wonderful experience of my life".
It was for all persons mentioned, and others, including the young son, Jude, that
Richard maintained incredible courage and determination in his effort to win a
massive battle. He had much to live for. To die was never a considered option.
The ordeal lasted for seven very long months. From July until his eventual release
from pain ten days ago. His body could then take no more. He remained mentally
very well aware. During that long time, he was released from hospital, amongst some
euphoria and much optimism, 11 times. Sadly, it also became necessary for him to be
re-admitted 11 times.
Richard so often expressed his apology for the troubles HE was causing OTHERS.
Those who knew him well will immediately recognise how aptly such a remark
reflects his personality and nature.
Thus it is, that Richard has left us. His passing on has caused much sadness. Such
sadness will remain forever with several persons here present.
Ipswich Town FC has lost an ardent supporter.
To live in the hearts of those we leave behind is not to die. Thank you.
This is my speech for Richard:
Richard Sutton, Rich, Gorgeous, scrummy man but my favourite was always ‘you’re my favourite hubby…..’ it would always make him smile. Well I’ve completely embarrassed Richard now!!
I knew him for such a small amount of time compared to many of you. I have learnt though from all the many cards and letters, myself and the children have received that no matter the amount of time people knew Richard, you all saw him the same way, as one of the most genuine guys you could ever hope to meet.
When we first met, some of you may remember this, I was put with him to listen to his calls, at the call centre, as part of my training. Well I can safely say no calls were taken!!! He showed me enthusiastically how the systems and phones worked and then lost the call he was transferring, due to my talking he said!! I must admit I was talking endlessly due to nerves, and then we got onto the topic of a parachute jump! Well that was it no calls were taken, which didn’t go down well!!
The best thing though was I met Richard, we emailed from there and that was it an NU romance in the bag! That was one thing Rich and I loved to do was reminisce of how we met and stories of the children growing up. It never failed to put a smile on our faces.
You just had to look into Richards face to see how proud he was of his life and his family around him. Words never seemed enough, so we would have competitions telling each other ‘ I love you more than you can imagine’, the reply would be ‘I love you more than that‘, and he would go, ‘well how do you know that, as you can’t imagine how much I love you!! A ‘Sutton’ sense of humour we used to call it! His favourite was, when you were watching a film, he would go…..’is it going the way you want it to go….? You’d turn and there would be a broad cheeky grin across his face. Ah that’s where the children have got it from.
Ellie and Jude, goodness how he loves them. He was proud watching Ellie settle into school and be the winner of Team Points in her year. Jude growing in character every day, whilst both of them having Richards kind and caring temperaments. Gosh that has to be something to be proud of.
I, his wife, well words can’t describe my loss. He was my husband, best friend, Daddy to our children, he was and will always be my soul mate. We were a team. I’m so proud that he chose me to be his wife. I inherited a loving family who thought the world of their Richard, and they will remain to be very much a part of my family. He will also be greatly missed throughout my immediate family.
One thing that I may ask of you all that you remember my husband , not as someone who lost a battle, but someone who went through life as a Winner. Richard strove to do his best at everything , he loved his football and music, he won so many medals and trophies for football, hockey and running. He loved and was content with his life with the children and I. He was and will remain to be, my Hero.
This is the speech from Richard's friends at Norwich Union:
Sally has asked me to say a few words about Richard on behalf of his colleagues and friends.
We first met Richard 5 years ago when he joined our team.
He was an instantly likeable guy, genuine, helpful, kind and uncomplicated. Funny, popular, a real team player.
Richard was an all-round sportsman, the star player of our annual Norwich Union 7-a-side football team, where he also brought along his family as the team's cheerleaders.
As you know, Richard was also a dedicated Ipswich Town supporter, much to the frustration of the Norwich City fans in the team.
You could always guarantee lots of football banter the days before and after a local derby.
Richard was always one of the first to volunteer to take part in charity events. We remember his impressive run in the London Marathon and also in June 2000, leading the team home in the 3 peaks challenge where despite being soaked through he was the only person who managed to sleep on the mini-bus.
Richard was a joy to work with, he was always prepared to help people out, he was polite, cheerful and well respected by everyone he came into contact with.
But without a doubt our over-riding memories of Richard will be as a devoted family man, a proud husband and father and a loving brother and son.
Throughout his illness, the support and love he received from his family was second to none.
Richard was one of the most genuine people we've ever met. He never had a bad word to say about anyone and was always interested in what other people had to say.
He was always smiling and remained positive even during his illness, never complaining, extremely brave, an inspiration to us all.
Richard was more than a colleague, he was a friend.
We're glad our paths through life crossed and his memory will stay with us all forever.
Quotes from sympathy cards recieved:
Please find below excerpts from cards and letters myself and the children have received:
I began to get to know the real Richard. He was a lovely kind guy and very clever. Richard’s own achievements with FPC 1,2 and 3 motivated me to do the same.
Take joy in the fact that those two beautiful children will forever be a little piece of him for you to hold onto.
You have Ellie and Jude who are an unforgettable memory of Richard. Just because he’s not there don’t stop talking to him, as someone said ‘I’m just in the next room’.
Richard was simply one of the nicest people I have ever met, and I don’t often say that about someone!
Richard was the nicest , kindest and most laid back person I have ever had the pleasure of knowing!
As you know, Richard was the nicest , most genuine person you could ever hope to meet and will always be remembered.
Richard was a lovely man and a great friend, a great pleasure to work alongside. He will be missed but not forgotten . As a fellow Ipswich supporter I will always think of Rich when I look for Town’s results and give a cheer for him!
Richard was one of the nicest blokes we had ever met, and to have you both as our friends meant a great deal.
My fond memories of numerous escapades with Richard will always be with me and now treasured even more.
He was without doubt the nicest man I have ever met, and I will miss him deeply. I am honoured that he called me his friend.
Richard was a true gentleman.
He was a lovely man and you both were a great team.
He was a lovely man and you were so happy.
He was a find and genuine person, who I had a lot of respect for.
It was a real pleasure to have known and worked with him.
Richard was a good friend to me over the years. It goes without saying I will miss him a great deal!!!
…..and when I saw you both in the summer I was struck by the affection between you…..
We have always had great affection for Richard and have happy memories of holidays he spent with us in the Sicily Isles………he enjoyed the sea and the freedom the islands gave …….throughout the ordeal of Richards treatment we marvelled at the courage of Richard………
Sally, Richard was special to us too. He had a special place in my affections, because we both loved sport………Richard was a fine lad. A great credit to his Mum & Dad. We’re going to miss him and will never forget him.
Richard was such a lovely person, and its an old fashioned word but he was probably the most decent person I’ve known. It was recognising some of Richards qualities in my partner, and seeing your happiness as a family that let me know that it might be possible for me. We’ll all be wishing we spent more time with him. I’ve thought for a while you two were the bravest people I know.
I only hope you can take comfort from the fact that Richard was one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. He was always friendly and always willing to help when help was needed. You should take strength and pride that he chose to spend his life with you.
Richard has left us with good memories and although he is no longer with us physically he lives on in those memories.
….but his face truly lit up as he described that he has less time for sport as he had recently had a baby daughter, Ellie. Richard was one of life’s true gentlemen. Richard was a joy to work with, he was always prepared to help people out, he was polite, cheerful and well respected by everyone he came into contact with. He was always so positive, content and genuinely happy with his life.
I’ll never forget his smile and his ability to eat everyone under the table……Richard was such a calm person, easy going and a great listener, but he also had a ‘cheeky’ side to his nature. It was a real privilege to have known Richard, as an employee but more importantly as a friend. He was so proud of you, Ellie and little Jude, so grateful to his sister Joanne and so close to his parents. I’ve no doubt that he is watching over you all now.
I only knew Richard for three and a half years, but I can genuinely say that in more than 20 years with Norwich Union, I have rarely met anyone as committed, enthusiastic and hard working. It was a pleasure to work with him…..I never heard him grumble…..He was a gentle man in every sense, so proud of his family and with very traditional and decent values that were a great credit to you and his parents.
I hope it may be some comfort to you that Richard was so highly thought of. If you’ll allow me to borrow one of your phrases from the Blogspot website, Richard was a hero to a lot of us as well. We won’t forget him.
Thank you for all of your support and kind thoughts
Sally, Ellie and Jude
